Ooo, oooh, this is just what I was looking for! j/k :)

Jima <jima at gimp.damnation.net> writes:

>  I came into work this morning and found three copies of this
> spam.  (It was a dual spam, bundled with "search engine secrets," but that
> was nowhere near as funny.)  I thought some of you might enjoy some comedy
> this morning. ;)
> 
>      Jima
> 
> --- snip ---
> Subject: Over 1000 Hacker/Security Utilities on CD
> 
> Now, personal computer security is more important than
> ever! This is the perfect Christmas gift.
> 
> Have you ever wondered how a 15 year old kid can hack
> into a government computer, credit cards, create
> viruses, use ATM cards, talk for hours on free
> cellular calls, and do any one of a thousand
> miraculous things that adults with degrees in Computer
> Science cannot do? These kids are not geniuses, they
> just have access the to programs found on this CD and
> learned how to use them. Having the right software and
> practice is key.
> The utilities found on this CD are not available at
> your local computer store. I have gathered over 1,000
> hard to find programs that will help you to learn
> about computer security and protect yourself.
> The purpose of this CD is to give you the knowledge
> you need to begin to protect your computer/network.
> Even though there are over 1,000 utilities on this CD,
> only the few utilities below are needed to really
> learn about computer security.
> Ideally, it's best to have 2 lab computers to work
> with. Do not use any of the programs on this CD on
> mission critical computers. To conduct your very
> first DoS attack (how exciting) unzip the file the
> included files. You must find out the IP address of
> the computer you want to DoS. This program requires a
> source address (obviouly make it a spoofed address,
> 1.1.1.1) and the destination address (the IP of the
> victim machine - a.b.c.d). At a dos prompt, type
> "program_name" 1.1.1.1 a.b.c.d, and hit enter.
> a.b.c.d is the destination address. At this point
> jolt should be causing the cpu of the destination
> computer to be at around 100%. To stop jolt just
> ctrl+c. Now, to protect yourself from a DoS attack,
> install the firewall program found on the CD on the
> destination computer. The firewall takes a bit of
> configuration but works well once it is set up. Try a
> DoS again and see what happens.
> The included firewall will protect your computer from
> almost every exploit found on this CD.
> 
> 
> 
> TOM4TA - File Extras - Over 1,000 other utilities that
> as a system administrator, you should know exist.
> This is what the enemy has in his/her arsenal...and
> now so do you.
> The CD price is $24.95. Order now!
> 
> 
> Order HackerVillage - Security Tutorial w/utilities
> here!
> 
> <http://[snip]>
> --- snip ---
> 
> _______________________________________________
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> http://www.mn-linux.org
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-- 
Jon Schewe | http://mtu.net/~jpschewe | jpschewe at mtu.net
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels 
nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any 
powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all 
creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that 
is in Christ Jesus our Lord. - Romans 8:38-39